Adjustments Needed

Disappear. Come back. Disappear. Pop in again. Disappear.

What a pattern…

I miss blogging. Well… writing. 

But every time I start turning back towards it, I quickly sidestep away again.
Fear? Of commitment. Of failure. Of mistakes. Of disappointing. Of disappointment. Of unsuccessful attempts. Of opening up. Of Being?

Of trying to figure out what to be, how to be, who to be.

Maybe the “food blog” thing doesn’t fit to a T anymore. Well, frankly, I don’t think it ever fit to a T per se, but it fit well enough that it could remain one of my semi-regular outfits with a bit of mild tugging and adjusting.

I think, though, that maybe I’ve outgrown that outfit now. Or maybe just for now.

But one way or the other, it just doesn’t feel like it fits anymore. And I think that’s why I struggle with writing. Because I just want to write outside of the box that I originally pigeon-holed this blog into in the first place.

Just write. About nothing. Everything. Whatever. And figure it all out along the way.

I just can’t take picture of all my “meals” anymore. It’s fun once in a while. I’ll probably still do it once in a while. But not everyday. Or every second, or third. Done with that…for right now. (Plus, no iPhone = no Instagram… and that is the newesttrendiest way to food blog, no?)

Time to reach beyond meals and exercise. They mean something, but what else is out there? What else is out there for Me?

It might soon be time to move beyond the ‘Lighter Portions’ walls. New blog box to settle into? Maybe.

Life is full of a whole lot of maybes right now. A whole lot. Probably more maybes (and a whole lot more I don’t knows and what the hecks and help me pleases) than I’ve ever experienced before. Quarter life crisis and GO. Thank you 20s.  You’re terrifying…awesomely full of potential, but still unbelievably terrifying.

And that about sums up the current state of my mind – Random, inconclusive, messy, confused, over analytical and never, ever shutting off.


5 thoughts on “Adjustments Needed

  1. Blog about whatever you want to blog about. You are only pigeonholed if you allow yourself to be. People will either read or not.

    Also, Instagram is available on Android as well if you have one of those :)

    • Yep, I realize the pigeonholing is fully my own doing and responsibility. I’m just trying to figure out how to manoeuvre myself out of it :). And I’m old school so no Android either. Still rocking a Blackberry!

  2. For as long as you are searching for the true self, you will definitely find the best. But don’t forget to enjoy the journey itself, appreciate every little discovery that makes you feel good. Follow your intuition. :) Just keep doing that. :) And- yes – blog about anything you feel like – no one has given you the boundaries! ;) Hugs!

  3. Just let it flow girl. That way the definition will just manifest, rather than you trying to create the definition before you explore. Does that make sense? I hope so! I’m just so pleased to see you back!

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